The first time I tased, it hurt.
Read MoreSoftening Up: A Journey to Self-Love
LIfestyle
How Millennials Killed Me
in LIfestyle, Reflection
And I can hear the Millennials outside, taunting me with their cries of “hey what’s up you guys” as they livestream the door to my room, biding their time until I run out of food, or willpower…
Read More7 Quick Steps To Your Perfect Beach Body
"Sharon from the PTA will not roll her eyes at my rolls ever again!"
Read MoreNew England’s Top 5 Best Fahkin Lobstah Rolls
Ask Tom Brady, he'll give ya the exact same list!
Read MorePublic Safety: Miami Vice
The Boys in Brown are back at it again, this time tearing it up in Miami!
Read MorePetition: Let Me And My Family Open Carry At The Jersey Shore
Look, if I can take my CANNON-LIKE arms onto the beach, why not my other deadly weapons?
Read MoreSand Between My Toes
Who doesn’t enjoy sitting on a warm, sunny beach and feeling the miniscule grains of the Earth, post-erosion, massaging the very delicate corns of their feet?
Read MoreThe 5 Best Places In Kevin’s Beach House To Fuck Kevin’s Girlfriend
in LIfestyle, Recreation, Listicle
It's a shame his place doesn't have a helipad...
Read More5 Gifts for Father’s Day That Say "Where Have You Been For 15 Years?"
He could be anywhere!
Read MoreSearch For The Hofstra Statue That Gives You Good Luck For Finals
I've heard tell, that somewhere on this campus you can find good luck.
Read More